Tuesday, 18 March 2008

Why Women are Crabby

We started to 'bud' in our blouses at 9 or 10 years old only to find that anything that came in contact with those tender, blooming buds hurt so bad it brought us to tears. So came the ridiculously uncomfortable training bra contraption that the boys in school would snap until we had calluses on our backs.
Next, we get our periods in our early to mid-teens (or sooner). Along with those budding boobs, we bloated, we cramped, we got the hormone crankies, had to wear little mattresses between our legs or insert tubular, packed cotton rods in places we didn't even know we had.
Our next little rite of passage was having sex for the first time which was about as much fun as having a ramrod push your uterus through your nostrils (IF he did it right and didn't end up with his little cart before his horse), leaving us to wonder what all the fuss was about.
Then it was off to Motherhood where we learned to live on dry crackers and water for a few months so we didn't spend the entire day leaning over Brother John . Of course, amazing creatures that we are (and we are), we learned to live with the growing little angels inside us steadily kicking our innards night and day making us wonder if we were preparing to have Rosemary's Baby.
Our once flat bellies looked like we swallowed a whole watermelon and we pee'd our pants every time we sneezed. When the big moment arrived, the dam in our blessed Nether Regions invariably burst right in the middle of the mall and we had to waddle, with our big cartoon feet, moaning in pain all the way to the ER.

Then it was huff and puff and beg to die while theOB ? says, 'Please stop screaming, Mrs. Hearmeroar . Calm down and push. 'Just one more good push' (more like 10), warranting a strong, well-deserved impulse to punch the
%$#*@*#!* hubby and doctor square in the nose for making us cram a wiggling, mushroom-headed 10 pound bowling ball through a keyhole.
After that, it was time to raise those angels only to find that when all that 'cute' wears off, the beautiful little darlings morphed into walking, jabbering, wet, gooey, snot-blowing, life-sucking little poop machines.

Then come their 'Teen Years.' Need I say more?

When the kids are almost grown, we women hit our voracious sexual prime in our early 40's - while hubby had his somewhere around his 18th birthday.
So we progress into the grand finale: 'The Menopause,' the Grandmother of all womanhood. It's either take HRT and chance cancer in those now seasoned 'buds' or the aforementioned Nether Regions, or, sweat like a hog in July, wash your sheets and pillowcases daily and bite the head off anything that moves.
Now, you ask WHY women seem to be more spiteful than men, when men get off so easy, INCLUDING the icing o n life's cake: Being able to pee in the woods without soaking their socks...
So, while I love being a woman, 'Womanhood' would make the Great Gandhi a tad crabby. You think women are the 'weaker sex?' Yeah right. Bite me.

Monday, 10 March 2008

Inspiration Sketches

Thought I might put up some inspiration Sketchs.

Some of these are from Page Maps and various other great sketches like Chris Greiser.

Wedding Layout

Layout created for Local Scrapbook Shop "Rrip It Scrapbooking"
For a class.
The photos from my sister's wedding.

Sunday, 9 March 2008

Cyber Crop at Scrap with V

These two Layouts are from the Cyber Crop on this weekend at Scrap with V and these are my take one 2 Challenges. One using green and yellow and a 4 leaf clover to which I cut a green flower up. And the pink one was of a Sketch layout. My Scrapping Mojo has been on holidays for a very long time and hopefully I can get back into the groove again.

Saturday, 8 March 2008

More Gorgeous Bundles

More Gorgeous Bundles walking out the door.
I just love creating these.
This one above is worth $80.

The Heat is On

With the sweltering heat in Adelaide I'll be putting my feet up and doing some scrapping.
So Come over to Scrap With V having a huge Cyber Crop going on great challenges and great fun.
Cyber Crop
Chatting, Heaps of Challenges, Fun Games, Kids Challenges, More Chatting and Great Prizes.
You'll have a ball of fun.

Tuesday, 4 March 2008

Bit of A Bad Run

It never rains but pours. From a Miscarriage in January to a family friend getting shot to Mitch not well. Hoping things get better now.

Anyway on the Job Hunt at the moment. So hopefully something good comes along soon.

Really looking forward to the Scrap with V Retreat I so need a holiday.
Anyway I'll be back doing my blog again. And hopefully things settle down again so I can put up more scrap layouts.
Hope to put up more Off the Page stuff too.



Sunday, 2 March 2008

Neglecting my blog

Sorry to those that normally read my blog. So many things have been happening. Had a friend of the family that was shot. So its been a bit difficult to deal with. I myself thought I'd be ok. But now and then it really hits me.

I hope to be a lot better from now on.

Lots has been happening at Scrap with V so be sure to have a look.
All the new DT's have been selected so come and meet them. Lots of new and exciting things will hopefully happen soon too there that will make it a pretty happening Scrapping place to be.

Chat soon.